THEME

friend:

what are you gonna be for halloween?

me:

drunk
SMIZE
SMIZE

tylenold:

it’s not you’re* or your*. it’s all Mine. everything is Mine

brxkenpetal:

☁MASTURBATION TIPS☁

batdude:

 sometimes you just gotta put on a full face of makeup for no reason

(Source: ripjily)

pinkvelourtracksuit:

it irritates me when i see women put down other women for their preferences in hair and makeup. like if a bitch want to wear a 22 inch malaysian sew in with a contoured face and long eyelashes that is her business!!!!! u hoes kill me with that ‘she so fake. i bet it takes her forever to get ready in the morning’ type bullshit. like look, just because u may not wear much makeup or rock ur real hair, don’t put down the next bitch for doing her thang!!!!! growUp.org

My boyfriend’s cap is hot.

Me:

I want meat!

Boy:

I've got some meat you can have.

Me:

I want chicken, not sausage, thanks.

Boy:

It's a chicken sausage.

Me:

Can we deep fry it?

Boy:

You can deep throat it...

owlapin:

making a resume when u have no experience 

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